Monday, December 12, 2016

give me something , sad soul

a fresh new week begins,
but i still could remember every single second and moment of the whole downfall 
it was that moment which made me believe all the cliche quotes
'learn to love yourself more'

This probably happens to every 3 out of 5 girls. The pain and the heartache, the deep heartaches. The ones which gives you that minty feeling inside your chest. The negative thoughts clouding the mind, over thinking to the point where its not analysing. 

Shall you ever believe in love again? Or even this person again?
this brutal act can never be forgotten , ever. 

Closing in the dark light. 
There is loneliness, the one person which we can ever rely on, ourselves. 

Recapping the moment, sharp words were ripped out by in the car. It just came by so quickly , when anger and stress hits the spot, it all goes amuk. And there it was, walking away. This was the mistaken . No one should ever walk away during an intense argument. NEVER

Tears streaming, it was obvious. The soul returns to its humble base filled with emotional negativities. 
It was then ANGER grew to frustration and MORE LIES. 

 A place where it will always be my everything, it opened its doors to me. Without hesitation, i took hostage inside but it was dark and empty, alone. It was evident, thoughts and more thoughts. 
I needed distraction, i got some but it didn't last. 

Telling myself to go to bed, shut my brain . It just kept going, until that phone call. 
The phone call which distinguish the whole plot of this. 
Laughing to myself, what a waste of space, this bullshit act of friends you have. 
despite it all, i still have to save you from all this
Did you really think i deserve this?

Something inside persuaded me to take charge, i did. MISTAKE
Maybe someone up there is really testing my ability to love
this is life worth living ?
faith is broken,
hands are bounded

that cold call, what you say tells me nothing
whats the truth, give me something

the conversations , the lies, the codes. 
Its all all irrelevant. Because it was done, that was the straw. 
The voice heard was all it took

i just wanted something to hold onto , 
I've got nothing, 
The fear of losing is now reality. 

Lost all the way, lost all reason. 

A rose and a balloon, doesn't make up for nothing
Paper bills don't make no difference
Your words just didn't mean a damn 
The hurt was real, it was there and it still is. 
the broken glass on the floor, had no reflection 

Still i went back to the very god damn place we started out, all the memories and everything else in between. 

Was i ready to let it go ?
Was that what i intended to happen ?

How do we vindicate the truth?
Do i really want to know what happened?
Do i really believe every word you say ?

This was a side of you, I've seen all along just waiting, like a prey. 
ANGER, was the trigger. 
Time will heal they say, it will , but never recover. 
Time will make you stronger, but it comes with vulnerability 

To the actual truth, i may never find or hear from you . 
But i will be patiently wait for you to reveal. 
To the people around on the vague dark environment, 
the bridge is burnt for you. 
To you , 
i pray to love you again, someday, one day. 

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