deeper

Shes lost her sanity for words, the lack of sleep does justice to her piece of mind.Like a dark child numb and dumbfounded, bounded to heartbreak.What hurt this child was smtg so close and intimate. Something personal.Someone personal.
Abusive thoughts pondering and floating amongst the air she breathes, she lives and feed on these pain ..when does it ever end?repeatedly shes tried to reposition herself into this cold, endless political world. the consequence will still remain constant and inevitable. is there hope to be bound to truth someone so deep again?how much lies does it take to learn about the truth? insecurity bounds these lies and truths. 

what defines love?

shes lost herself in the world of silence and lies. letting herself believe in a religion and ritual which she didnt deserve to be in. 

all she wanted was to love and be loved, simple and simply. no regrets, no holding back, just pure happiness. day by day flowing through the days without negativity, shouldnt this be what we are living for? waking up to his beautiful smile, being the one for this other soul, merrying along the days. her guards down for this person, believing in his every word, no doubtings, offering a portion of her heart. there is not  a single doubt that she longs for him, his truth his trust his smile, his soul. she recognises the fear of losing him,which is being outgrown by the emotions she has for him. 

however,

purity simple happiness still seems so out of reach for her.